Not Really Goodbye

It’s really hard to say goodbye to friends and colleagues who have been with you through several years of struggle in the promotion of an “ideal” and a “process” that is both elusive and promising. These dedicated people who are first my friends rather than colleagues, served as mentors and co-adherents for a dream that have been muddled with "too much" human intervention.

I would like to thank them all: for the friendship, motivation, partnership, teamwork and lessons learned. Though conflict is inevitable due to our peculiarities, I shall treasure the best and trying times of our work together for the peace process.

Nonetheless this is not really goodbye. I may be in a different battlefield but it's still the same war. Good luck to all of us.

Horrific tales in the city

I have been suppressing this insistent voice within me and no amount of brooding could ever convince me otherwise. I’m beginning to lose my faith in the goodness of people. I used to believe on the inherent kindness of men towards his own kind. I look back and realize the stark difference: What have we become, have we evolved from a critical mass to an indifferent majority that we care less about the basic codes of a civilized society?

You may ride but…

My bottled-up frustration is taking the better of me. Yesterday my fiery temper was ignited as I reprimanded a taxi driver who refused to take me from Megamall to Greenhills. This is not an isolated case of discourtesy; I have been repeatedly refused to board taxis by these impolite drivers even as a pregnant woman.

One particular case took place last year as I boarded a taxi in the Ultra area after attending the office’s sportsfest. I got interviewed by this arrogant driver who halted his cab upon learning of my destination and began hollering on the (perceived) terrible traffic in Ortigas and Shaw. I did not budge that moment; I berated him for his rudeness for he seems oblivious of my protruding belly. The discussion was getting nowhere and having realized that I wasted my time, I got out of the cab. I have reported three incidents including this case to the DOTC through e-mail and text and I never heard any feedback on my complaints. The driver was never punished - he is one abusive, gender insensitive, scott free brute tolerated by our weak governance system.

You may enter but…

The other day, an inspection of my belongings nearly transformed me into Ms. Grumpy again. This lady guard in the mall readily shoves her hand inside my backpack even before I could fully open it. She begun squeezing and clutching the contents of my bag. It took great effort restraining myself to tell her, “Do I look like your regular terrorist? If I had a bomb I wouldn’t put it inside my accessory kit that’s too predictable. I’m going to stash it somewhere else,” instead I adamantly ordered her to stop touching my things for she was overdoing it. She only looked at me and replied, “Thank you Ma’am!” and did not apologize for the inconvenience she has caused.

You may have these free items but…

While waiting inside a mall, I saw this young couple being pursued by a man in black suit and tie. The Dad was carrying his squirming toddler while the Mom was hauling a giant baby bag. From a distant, it was clear that the young couple were now swayed into the agent’s ultimate agenda of selling insurance to them instead of being provided with the freebies indicated in the promotional ad handed earlier.

I do not really understand this marketing/ promotional strategy taking place in malls. Personally, I look at it as a deception scheme to unsuspecting mall-goers, to be lured into purchasing something you haven’t even planned for and using free give-away items as bait. What is wrong with honest and no-frills marketing? You offer a product and it advantages. The customer, without pressure or false claims from the seller, shall decide if he makes a sale or not.

I could go on ranting about these cases of incivility, some may even sound trivial; the point is, it says a lot about the prevailing values that most of our countrymen have and it’s quite disappointing. Having said that, I still hope that I am wrong.

Toxic

At some point in our lives we experience some form of cruelty in the hands of the people that ought to care for us. Our circumstances or context may vary and degree of how we felt its fangs gnaw on our wounds, the common factor is pain.

On second thought, pain could be a good instrument because it causes one to pause, contemplate and change direction.

One important lesson I have reaped from my interaction with these abominable creatures, which included former friends and colleagues and even relatives, is to accept these people the way they are for it takes a village to raise a child, these people just can’t help it; they were wired that way by their own unique society.

I call them “toxic” people and ridding them off one’s system is the best coping mechanism I have acquired through years of dealing with them.

Toxic (tok-sik) adj. 1. of or caused by poison. 2. Poisonous.(Reference: Oxford American Dictionary)

In this context, toxic people are good at betraying people who trust them. They feed you with poison words and if you let them get through you, they may seep and contaminate your blood. Remember you are your own person. Other people’s words and their perception of you only matter when you cooperate with them. Never endorse it.

Toxic people bear the following qualities:

1. They think they are better than the rest of us.
2. They never owe an apology nor explanation for a mistake that have caused hurt or that have compromise another person's integrity.
3. They tell you what you can and cannot do.
4. They are self-centered.
5. They need you only when they need you.
6. They are naturally vile.

Get rid of them and live light!