Not Funny

• It's not funny when you discover by accident that someone you hold dear has practically lifted 3 paragraphs of your old blog post without your knowledge and consent. Imagine a piece of your thought copied verbatim, then spruced up by an additional closing paragraph for a cheeky ending statement. I could not believe it myself when I first read it. I don’t know how to feel, I guess the right word here is dumbfounded. Someone has plagiarized my writing. I was thinking that maybe it was done unwittingly but any form of plagiarism is a deliberate act and the additional insult comes from knowing the person who has copied your idea. The "Copier" took it without considering that a writer can only call it her own unless she blows life into it. Rubbing more salt to the wound, she filed the lifted section using the same title I did 3 years ago.

• It’s not funny when someone you know, not really a friend just someone you work with makes fun out of something you feel the opposite. Example when you got a sick child and someone who thinks she’s smart makes a joke out of it. Well the person committing such a despicable act is not only sick and cruel, she is one rotten soul. I say what I want to say, this is my blog!

• It’s not funny when you want to break away from the grinder machine but you can’t. On 2nd thought - I can! I must stop complacency from consuming my zeal and start taking charge of what’s going on with this department in my life right now. It not too late for a carpe diem!

Image: Angry Buttercup from Cartoon Channel

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What a terrible day! I can’t just put it into words. I have been reduced once again to someone who lost a friend - another comrade-in-arms. I can’t do a thing to stop “it”. It’s so frustrating. I could feel the edge slipping through my fingers. How many more should I count or should I even dare count?

Murmurs (s2.)

Been doing a lot of murmurings lately, I call the 1st one “the bite” and the 2nd one “the 2 evils”, here goes:

I have fangs. I grew them while dealing with wicked people. I sharpened it through a number of scrapes and bruises against malign motives thrown by the stuck-up lot.

This is my best feature. I bite. I chew. I live. (Can also be read as: I live, I bite, I chew.) Provocation is not good for me because I don’t have the patience for people with bloated egos. I refer to patience as a single horse-hair strand to which the sword of Damocles is fastened, dangling from the ceiling above his head, threadlike yet sturdy, tough yet fragile. It’s amazing when you think about how two opposing characteristics could appear at the same time on a particular circumstance, though this is not always the case as one would supersede the other anytime soon.

*****

So what holds you back from expressing yourself?

I did an informal survey among friends and here are 3 general responses:

1. I might not say the right thing.
2. What will ______ think of me?
3. I might be misinterpreted.

While you may have a different answer from the ones cited above, it all boils down to fear of judgment. So the culprits are fear and judgment, these 2 evils are unnecessary and are of our own making. To have a healthy outlook in life, we must decide to face our fears since it is the only way for us to go. Oh well, I intend to keep my voice steady and heard in a sea of boisterous laughter and howls of despair.

“Fearlessness is facing what you fear with power.”

Image: Flash-screen.com

Hello Ms. Grumpy!

I am angry, very angry. This emotion which I have successfully kept under control for the last 3 months has finally caught up with me, bursting at the seams, ignoring pleas to calm down by my reasonable conscience. It was triggered this morning when SRacer’s yaya neglected a regular duty which I have firmly reprimanded her for more than 10 times already. My anger exploded into tremendous proportions that after a slew of words between gritted teeth, my temper was still running high, I could feel my blood curl with the amount of chemical imbalance taking toll inside my body.

My fury even translated into crashing open our garage gate that irked Hubby, this gave me the sign to stop for I’m up to no good. As I plop down in the front seat beside him, I sighed deeply, trying hard to ease down my volatile temper into normal levels. I know this is not healthy, I read somewhere that when you’re terribly angry, your body reacts to the sudden surge of emotions and produces toxins which is flushed into the bloodstream affecting the whole bodily functions. This awareness did not even stop me from becoming upset again.

I have always been an angry person, I get easily irritated and patience has never been my strength. However after an hour of reflection, I took this weakness to heart and look for ways on how to deal with it squarely. More than the Yaya issue, I have a lot of dealings with in my surroundings – workplace, household, family,and friends’arena. I recognize that the more I try to control the variables of my primary and secondary circle, the more I cultivate grounds for frustration. I can only do much but I do not have the power to control anything that is fixed nor given (e.g. other’s attitudes, beliefs, etc). I resolve to be good to myself and not to punish myself with the shortcomings and inefficiency of others.

Like them, I am also a work in progress. I pray to the Lord for serenity, courage and wisdom. And yes for more courage to douse the raging bull that I am.

Photo: Angry Little Asian Girl by Lela Lee

Begone!

Some people really think they own the world and all its contents. They act like some kind of a demigod who has the knack for making the lives of others miserable like their own. I see them in everyday life like in the following situations:

• a person, believing that her life is much more important and valuable, laughed at her friend who nearly drowned in a swimming pool
• a person, thinking he owns the monopoly of knowledge, made fun of a dear friend who took the extra mile to explore her creativity through blogging
• a person, confirming he is indeed superior, ridiculed others who found difficulty in organizing their thoughts and expressing themselves in large assemblies
• a person, assuming her significance among the herd, took the feelings of others for granted by issuing empty words
• a person, wise only with his conceit, uses his race and color to justify an offense against a co-worker

In pausing, we are all a speck in this infinite universe and that no one has the right to undermine others, regardless of color, education, age, wealth and beliefs. To this arrogant lot - I say begone!

I Stand on my Desk

I just can't let this pass. I agree that we as Filipinos must set the record straight. We must not tolerate others, particularly other racial groups to commit disgraceful actions that demean us as a people.

The BBC and Tiger Aspect Production (TAP) clearly have a role in perpetuating blatant inaccuracies on the Filipino. As media players, BBC as a global network and TAP as a producer of the Harry and Paul show, are duty-bound in the promotion of truthful information, in this case, the projection of proper image and impression on the Filipino migrant worker.

It is very clear that the Harry and Paul Show, episode 4 (aired on the 26th and 29th of September 2008) showing a gyrating Filipina maid in front of a demented Briton is a deliberate example of prejudice at two levels. First it discriminated the Filipinos through stereotyping; the use of a Filipina maid, and the producer's justification by saying it was an absurd show. Second it dicriminated the Filipina "women" by potraying her as a sex toy; the Filipina maid is commanded during the scene to present her rear for mounting.

Despite growing protest, both remained indifferent while the British government reasoned with our Philippine embassy in London that it did not share the same views with the network and producer.

While others think that we are just being onion-skinned, I think the opposite. As Filipinos, we are responsible in upholding and preserving our dignity as a people. We must be vigilant to reject discrimination and violence in any form. The economies of power-countries are crumbling down, an example that there is no immunity to imperfection and that there is no reigning superiority, only passing dominance.

Let our petitions be heard to correct this ignorance against us: http://www.gopetition.com/petitions/dignity-and-respect-for-the-filipino-worker.html

Meltdown

This is a nightmare story for me. Yesterday my son was released from school to an “unconfirmed driver” without my consent and proper clearance. The thought that my son may have been released to an “unidentified” person caused me alarm and terrible panic. What could get worse, I was in the office in the middle of a killer project deadline and was left helpless on the phone when the teacher's assistant could not answer my basic question, “Why did you release my son to an unconfirmed driver?” I was really angry, I could feel the heat from my nape rising to my head, and literally my blood was boiling. I feared for the safety and security of my little boy. The school did not inform me of the full details of the incident like the absence of my son’s Yaya, the only official and legitimate fetcher registered in school. How could the staff conjure up this “brilliant” idea that the new “driver” was now the new fetcher?

My ultimate concern was my son, only 3 years old, left to his own defenses, traveling home from school with a stranger who told the school that he was picking up my kid without the Yaya. The authenticity of the stranger was in question. I wanted to cry but my infuriation has gained over. I collected myself and requested the teacher in charge to do all things possible to check if my son did made it home. I called my husband who was as exasperated as I was and he made calls to home to check on our kid’s arrival.

Thank God my son made it home. The ordeal made me realize a lot of things. You can never compromise the safety and security of your children even in a seemingly “good” environment. Schools must be compelled to implement responsive security and safety procedures for its students particularly on the releasing of young children to legitimate fetchers. The effectiveness of these procedures largely rests on the school staff who must be equipped with the proper frame of mind and ability to discern and prevent situations that may jeopardize a child’s welfare.

I went to my son’s school today and filed a formal complaint against the school and involved staff. I am doing this for my kid in recognition of his right to safety, security and protection as well as for his classmates and schoolmates who equally deserve the best service that will ensure their well-being while in school premises and in transit from school to home. This is not an imposition rather a reiteration of responsibility.

Grumble

I am more than what meets the eye! I am more than my 5’1’’, 140 lb frame! If only I could blurt this out to the next person giving me a physical appraisal without my consent. What is wrong with people nowadays? Gone were the days when a simple hello was enough to start a genuine conversation. It seems like most people have turned out to be acerbic and rude. Sometimes I restrain myself from barking back “Why comment, you have metamorphosed into an ugly beast yourself!" … or curtly, “You’ve grown hideous!”…or more simply put, “You’re ugly!”

It really irks me when someone, an acquaintance for instance, takes full liberty to do an evaluation and run down on my weight gain. This is my body, no matter what size it is, it served me well. I’ve been up and healthy for the past 29 years and it has produced me a child and again is accommodating another one. Why does it matter to others that you are not as slender as you were 10 years ago? Don’t they know a thing about bone structure, metabolism and stress eating? What about the size of your gray matter and what you have done to improve your humanity for the past 10 years? Doesn’t it count anymore?

During the renaissance, plump women were in! Their bodies were adored. Look at the paintings, plumpness symbolized beauty, fertility and prosperity. I know we are not in the renaissance but I am no fool- I am blunt but candid at the same time. Any person must be taken for what they are and not for how they look or how heavy or light they tip on the scales. Afterall, when we die, the Lord asks not how much you have or how heavy you’ve become but how you made out of your life on earth. Good luck then!